I stand with Israel, in prayer.

I want to say something meaningful, something that will comfort the hurt that we are all feeling.
But I've got nothing. Because right now my heart is shattered in a thousand pieces. I'm one post away from deleting facebook and escaping this horrible reality. I read the חדשות that don't seem so new anymore. It's an old, old story. Of hatred and contempt and violence. Its a story I'm so tired of hearing, and so many people are tired of living and dying.
So Gd, you said עשו שונה את יקעב but you also said וזכרתי את בריתי יעקב...הארץ אזכור
You promised G-d.
I sit here with tears streaming and amidst all this fire, I believe you.
I believe you Gd when You say that I'll get to live alongside my brothers and sisters and it won't be on the wrong side of the gun.
I believe You that our land is ours, and we'll live there in harmony. Our enemies but a distant nightmare.
I want to hear a shofar, not another siren.
I sit here clutching to my last strand of hope, praying the next gust of violence won't rip it away.
I believe you Gd when you say we won't have to feel this way anymore.
I believe you Gd, so please.
Please don't let me down.

On yet another tragedy.

It's a wonder that still throughout all these ages of Jewish suffering, the first thing we utter when someone passes is "baruch dayan emet". Blessed be the righteous judge. We hear of a murder and the first thing we do is praise the one who orchestrated it.
Because I guess, yes there is a time to be angry and demand the peace we must deserve. After all this, through all this there is no way you could look me in the eye and say we don't deserve peace. I will be angry and I will bang my fists on this table smeared  with the blood of my brothers. But. Baruch dayan emet. At the end of the day, He has it figured out. And even if its a scary fact, our lives are dependent on Him. Baruch dayan emet. Because surely, one of these days He will judge us, and it will be righteous.
So at the very least, say it as a prayer, a request. Please G-d, judge us righteously. And we will soar to the city we all belong in, alive and together.